Someone else.

“I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine: he feedeth among the lilies” Song of Solomon 6:3, KJV.

We had reached a point in our marriage when things became very difficult. There was no romance, we were struggling financially, both exhausted from physical demands, and we were always arguing about little things. To say I was dissatisfied is an understatement. The enemy would whisper in my ear, “He doesn’t care for you. He doesn’t know what he has. You would be happier with someone else.”

The truth is, I didn’t want someone else. I wanted my husband. I wanted him to love me and make me feel like I was the best thing that ever happened to him. The cry of most married women is not to be loved by someone else. Their cry is to feel loved and cherished by the one they’ve got. I didn’t know how to help my husband understand this, but God.

It’s amazing how God knows our unspoken prayers, and He hears the cries and longings of our hearts. He is fully aware of our needs, and although it took some years, He helped my husband to see and understand.

Maybe you’re at your wits end with a husband who seems to not understand anything you’re saying, but my sister, who gives understanding to our hearts? Who turns on the light in our minds and helps us to finally “get it”? God does. I know how frustrating it can be, but sister, you have to believe that God knows what you have need of, and He will touch your husband’s heart. Until he gets it, love him, and keep on receiving God’s overwhelming love. Let Him fill your cup until it overflows. You don’t have to go outside of your marriage to receive what God created your husband to provide. Be patient and trust God. He can turn your marriage into something you’ve long dreamed of.

Prayer: Father, I thank you for loving me. When my husband doesn’t seem to care, you reveal to me the truth. I receive your truth and refuse to believe the enemy’s lies. I choose to stay faithful to my vows, and I ask that you be my strength. Help me draw from you everything I need. I don’t want another man; I want the one I have. Help him see, God. Help us both understand how to love each other in a way that fills up our love tanks until it’s overflowing. Touch my marriage Lord and make it all you designed it to be. In Jesus name, Amen.

Challenge: Read “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman and learn eachother’s love language.

*This devotional has no intent, whatsoever, to encourage any woman to stay in a marriage where there is abuse and/or adultery.

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23 thoughts on “Someone else.”

  1. Wow! God IS Awesome ! This message is just what I needed even though I read a day later. I went to read DOCK yesterday but was so discouraged with my life of being in a marriage I dont understand that I just didn’t want to read. So many replays and the testimony of the message replies to me. I stay because I dont want to be outside of God’s Will and truly love my husband . I try to walk by Faith as God had called us to walk. It gets weary and frustrated when you dont see with your eyes but trust in God that it will all work out! God had NEVER failed anyone ! I know that things will be as my spirit keeps telling me and not as the enemy is saying and trying to get me to give up. I am more than a conquer in Christ Jesus !

  2. Wow!!! i need this, in my mirriage, I need the love again, to love each other, the way god what us to be , that is my pray today lord help use to be one again in everything and injoy each other again, ♥please help us lord, Amen 🙂

  3. Thank you sister! I’m a newly wed and feeling hopeless in my marriage this past month. Thank you very much for letting the Spirit lead you on this message!

  4. WOWWWW!!!!! Is all I can say. I feel just like Laura. This message has helped and encouraged me today. I am so blessed and thankful for D.O.T.K. I will continue to stay on my knees and not give up. I will fight the good fight of faith. I’ve been so depressed and even had anxiety attacks about my husband. I feel that he loves me at times but he constantly puts me last. Every one and everything before me. He lacks affection and attention towards me. We go days without speaking to one another. He serves our pastor and the church whole heartedly 7days a week plus his full time job which consists of 8hrs 5 or 6 days of the week. He comes home and there is not even an “hello” or “how was your day hunny”… Nothing!! But he gets in church and act as though everything is fine. He will greet and engage others in conversation and want even say a “good morning” to me. I’ve expressed many times on how this makes me feel. One minute or shall I say day or two he’ll change and be all loving then its back to me being last. I get sooo discouraged and feel unwanted and unloved. Could you all please pray for my strength in the Lord. I really want to be more caring and understanding and not give up…. Today’s post was right on time for me.

    1. Dear Corona, I hear your heart and understand what you are in personally. May I recommend Doug Weiss books “Intimacy Anorexia” and “Married and Alone”? I believe they would minister to your situation and help you understand. My marriage has been extremely hard with the stuff you mentioned and addiction and other things. I understand. God is bigger. Dig into Him for wisdom and pursue Him for love you aren’t receiving rightfully from your husband.

    2. Coronda I can relate to how you’re feeling. I am going through the very same thing. Over and over I told my husband how I feel. He changes for about 2 weeks and then back to the same old. I pray constantly for God to relight the candle in our marriage. Many times have I thought about walking away but our 3 children and the grace of God is what keeping me here.

  5. Please pray for me. Im struggling in my marriage and want to walk away. I struggle with how any good can come from this marriage. It is very difficult being under the same roof with someone who is very negative, complains all the time, and you dont even like or really love. Tired of it all and just want to walk away.

    1. Tonight you should watch the movie “War Room” its dedicated to your situation. God bless you my sister in Christ! Fight the good fight with faith, love, patience and most importantly prayer

  6. Been greatly blessed by this word. God bless you my Dearest sist. Yes, in cases of abuse and adultery the obvious is divorce. But Christ once said that this was not the original plan. Please sisters whatever situation we find ourselves in, let us first seek out our father’s intentions. It is well with our souls.

  7. My husband has shared he wants a divorce. I am trying to fight for my marriage. But I am weak and my heart is broken. I know he loves me and I love him. Please pray for us, for God’s will to be done.

  8. Thank you Father for giving us strength to resist the enemy’s lies. Bless my young male friend in the Marines and his wife as they struggle due to his temper & stress and her indiscretions. Help them understand Your guiding words, admit their faults, and embrace the path You have laid out for their marriage. You alone give the gift of life to a marriage. Thank you for inspiring DOTK to bring Your words of hope to us. Amen

  9. Hello Sister,
    I am writing this reply with tears running down.my cheeks.Because this message was definately written foe me. As i lay in bed wondering and pondering about my husband’s indiscretions and lack of communication when we argue. Just one word “sorry ” would some what shows that he cares and that he wants us to work, but he does not. So I that you for the reminder that God got me. Even though i know, the enemy puts ill thoughs in my head.
    Please continue to write about HIs will to encourage sisters like me. My faith during this period in our marriage is weakening my spirit man needs strengthening some days.

    God Bless You.

  10. Thank you DOTK FAMILY for this word today, I filed for Divorce last month, Thank you JESUS who gave me the OK. I purchased another Home in 2016 with my own money, paid in cash. This man wouldn’t leave my Home, I had to hire an Attorney. Now he’s OUT, THANK YOU JESUS. This was a abusive marriage, Thank you Father for Delivering me In Jesus Name Amen🙏👍👍👍💕💕💕💚💙💜💖💛

  11. I’m struggling with this because my husband has been having an affair. I pray to God everyday for strength and direction on how to handle this situation the right way, His way, but I get so lost and disheartened at times. Pray for me sisters, if you read this.

    1. Dear Amber, Goooood morning. My dear, God said it so clear in his Word. Read Exodus 20:14, you don’t have to stay with a man who cheats on you, you are more than a conqueror in Christ Jesus, this is NOT of GOD, pray God will give strength to move on, ask God for his WILL. Like the DOTK FAMILY said, Not to stay in a marriage where there is Abuse and Adultery. I Love you sister God will see you through

    2. There have been marriages restored after affairs have taken place. If you both want to save your marriage, it is possible. I will pray right now for wisdom for you, sister.

  12. Wow this is so timely. I literally just prayed for God to give me direction and show me a sign if I should keep fighting and praying for reconciliation in my marriage. We are currently separated and on two totally different pages. He is adamant it is over. Theatens divorce and says awful, hateful things. I have felt God urging me to stand in the gap and keep praying for my husband who is completely lost and in such a dark place. After last night’s horrible fight, I wasn’t sure I was hearing God right. I wasn’t sure I even wanted to be married to this man anymore. After reading this it just reaffirms God is telling me to not lose hope and keep praying through. Thanks DOTK! 🙌🏻❤️🙏🏻

    1. Oh yes. God will deal with you first, before your husband. Let Your husband see God in you to change you then your husband is going to want what you have, but first he’s the one will have to confront his faults to God and you. Keep Praying for him. Never preach to him. Keep loving him see his heart not the outside. There is a spiritual warfare in your marriage. Fight your Battle on your Knees. I understand been there. My marriage is Awsome God is amazing. You will win. Never give up

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